selfish
B1Pronunciation
UK
- /sˈɛlfɪʃ/
US
- /ˈsɛlfɪʃ/
Description
- Thinking mainly about yourself
- caring more about your own needs than others
- greedy
- self-centered
Imagine a little kid with a pile of cookies. If they gobble them all up without offering any to their friends, that is pretty selfish behavior. Being selfish means putting your own needs and wants ahead of everyone else's, often so much that you ignore or hurt other people. It is not always about things you can hold. Someone can be selfish with their time, attention, or kindness too.
Sometimes it is a small flaw, like not wanting to share a favorite toy. Other times it is more serious and can damage relationships and trust. Everyone looks out for themselves sometimes, but when a person keeps putting their own interests first without thinking about others, that is what this word describes. Think of Ebenezer Scrooge before his transformation. He is a classic example.
Selfishness describes the tendency to put your own well-being, pleasure, or advantage above everything else, often without caring enough about the needs and feelings of other people. It is more than just wanting something for yourself; it means choosing what you want even when it costs someone else.
The word has a strong negative meaning. It suggests a lack of care, empathy, or generosity. A selfish act might be refusing to help a friend in need because you are too busy with your own plans, or constantly talking about yourself without showing any interest in others. It can appear in many ways, from keeping too much for yourself and always wanting attention to using relationships for personal gain.
However, it is important to note that self-care is not the same as selfishness. Taking care of your own needs is healthy and necessary. Selfishness specifically involves ignoring the needs of others while chasing your own. There is a fine line.
Historically, the word comes from "self" and the suffix "-ish," which often adds a negative touch, similar to how "childish" differs from "childlike." A truly selfish person often struggles to see beyond their own point of view and lives in a narrow world of their own making. In literature and in life, selfishness is often shown as a character flaw that leads to isolation, unhappiness, and regret. Think of Gaston in Beauty and the Beast. He is driven by his own ego and desires, and he ends up alone. While putting yourself first is not always wrong, doing it again and again without caring about others is what defines this negative trait.
Examples
- 1
Everyday sharing
Maya seemed selfish when she took the last piece of cake without asking.
- 2
Family decision
He made a selfish decision and moved away without thinking about his kids.
- 3
Personal responsibility
It was selfish of me to expect you to cancel your plans for me.
Pattern
selfish of + person to + verb
used to say that person's action was selfish
- 4
Money sharing
She's selfish with her money and never offers to pay for anything.
Pattern
selfish with + thing
unwilling to share it
- 5
Hidden motive
He only apologized for selfish reasons, hoping she would trust him again.
- 6
Work boundaries
Setting boundaries at work isn't selfish if you're already doing your share.
Forms and spellings
1 form open this card.
Main spelling
- selfishadjective